Shine, · and · blue-beak · embers

RPS. So damn wrong, but what the fuck moral high ground have I got to stand on?

veronamay's have you seen him whom my soul loves.  It's Jenson/Jared, JSquared, whatever - two actors I've never seen on screen, two people I don't know, might as well be fiction - and this is about as AU as it gets outside a spaceship. Real people.

It's about sin.

I really wasn't intending to be on-line at all. It's been another long day, the same due tomorrow and Sunday too, and really all I was intending to do was curl up in front of the fire with one of the comforting, familiar Georgette Heyers of my childhood - one of the authors I turn to when feeling tired and over-stretched.

Tonight, having gone through all the old favourites this month - These Old Shades, Devil's Cub, Venetia - I've been reading The Foundling. For those of you who haven't read it, it's the story of Gilly, the young Duke of Sale, who at the age of nearly 25 sets out  - runs away! - on the first real adventure of his life after a cosseted and stifling adolescence. All sorts of adventures and entanglements ensue, one of which is the rescuing of a teenage boy, Tom, who has also run away from home with not so much as a nightcap. Tom refuses to divulge the name of his home or his papa, but makes his hatred of his tutor - Mr. Snape - very clear indeed.

Mr. Snape is a tutor who teaches the horridest dry fustian about Europe in the Middle Ages, a prosy, boring beast who has quite justly (according to Tom) been hit on the head and abandoned by his frustrated young charge. Mr. Snape's a famous flogger, a horrid old addle-pate, a gentleman who appears to Gilly to be a joyless individual.

Indeed, when Mr. Snape does appear rather more towards the end of the novel (I flicked forward) he's an unctuous and brawny individual who clings to Tom's Papa's shirtsleeves in a most slimy and unpleasant fashion. He's a sharp tongued individual as well - "No doubt you have your visiting card upon you, sir?" he asks Gilly, when the beleaguered Duke of Sale attempts to establish his credentials.

Sadly, this Mr. Snape (who came highly recommended, out of a Lord's house) looks as if he will shortly lose his position: Tom and Papa reconciled, it appears that the Duke's suggestion of boarding school for the young runaway will be followed. (Although, having been reading Ian Kelly's excellent Beau Brummel recently, I myself am not certain this is a good idea of the Duke's.)

... I was however most amused, and rather chuffed to discover that it is entirely possible that our own Professor Snape comes from a line of severe schoolmasters with a interest in obscure textbooks and a sharp wit to match.

A very, very happy birthday - one each! - to amonitrate and to unovis_lj.

I want to say something about how wonderful it was to meet both of you. I don't honestly know what to say. I wish you lived nearer: I wish I could drop round for coffee or you for dinner: I wish I could say, let's go to the theatre tonight. You gave of your interests and company with such grace.

I hope that today is (was?) exactly as you wish it to be.

Right now, it's all a bit of a blur and I've no idea what time my body thinks it is. But, yay, Escapade ... and the Getty. So:

It would take a whole new post to pay sufficient tribute to the people I've met. I'll do it, but not today. Today all I can think of is the amazing kindnesses of people I've met who have welcomed me into their homes and lives, of how much I wish they lived round the corner or  maybe even Manchester - somewhere reachable! - and of how much I wish I'd had the chance to talk to more people for longer.  I  am so very glad to have met, seen, waved at people: I've at least invited ... yikes! ... more people than I can put up at once to come over and stay, and hope very much (although not today. Not today!) they do.

To say, home safe. I am already missing the people I met in the States - so very many lovely people: cordelia_v, unovis_lj and tazlet of course, but also the Highlander people and the Snarry people whom I got to spend so little time with, and the general fandom people and random strangers and the Mexican car-washer Juan who put petrol in the car for me, major bless ...

I'll update on Escapade and the Getty in a bit - at 200+ on f-list and just about giving up. Let me know if there's something I should see.

I did not expect to come back with a new fandom to read. But, crumbs, Battlestar Galactica - whoa. Also Rome. q_i, do you have the DVDs (BS, not R) and when are you next up? - I have vids!

Despatches from the Marriot Hotel, Ventura. The sky is still clouded, but the air is warm and smells of the sea. It's 7.15am as I write this, and light, but when I went down to the pool this morning the sky was just lightening and the pool clear, still and blue. There are great piles of white towels folded on the loungers, and palm trees, and little groups of comfortable chairs around the courtyard. Stone pathways and marble, stepping stones and tile: textured for bare feet. I can't see any of it now, I'm sitting in the business centre, a very small room with two PCs, one of which is out of order. 

But I am very glad to have been to Baltimore. And as for the hospitality - oh, so kind. So very, very kind.

There is stage while traveling when things blur. What date is it? Where am I? Where should I be?

Looking out at a snowy landscape, trees, SUVs and a single Red Cardinal, I have time to quantify experience.

I don't travel to eat. But I do remember places by taste: flatbread and felafel, soft rubber cheese in Iceland, bread in France, beetroot soup in Poland ... bridies in Newcastle.

New York is gone, in a blur of subway and sound. I am so lucky to have met people I have known only by LJ for years: fandom is an astonishing adventure, and the people in it ... ah. There are people now who will always be welcome in my house.

The Amazing Neil Gaiman's Magnificent Oracular Journal (courtesy cluegirl - thanks!) pronounces the answer to 'Bang or whimper?'

To be Er.

Oh well. Moving on.
I love that moment when you hit OK for the out-of-office message on Outlook. I'm officially On Holiday. Kat goes to the garage tomorrow for the boys to look after while I'm gone: I've ironed BT's scarf and rebraided the ribbons in my hair, equipped myself with a large packet of peppermint tea and some plasters, and checked all over again what time the plane goes on Sunday. America! (Wonder if you can get the Saturday Telegraph?)

I should add ... I doubt I'll be on-line much. But I'm taking three notebooks and umpteen pens: I'm really hoping to write, so this is a good thing.

On the subject of writing - cthonus posts Torchwood. A Brief History of the Lammergeier in Wales . I always regret that cthonus' speaking voice doesn't come across in fiction. Caustic and witty, he says the things you think of saying three hours later, and he'd be my first choice for the perfect dinner party guest.

Otherwise ... I was really touched by many good wishes from dearly beloved staff. I can be horrible to work with ('scary') and meaning well isn't exactly the answer ... but I must be dong something right. :)

So on the current to do list -

 - Other Fiction (Nearly done. Much changed.)
- Clothing porn
- HL by request (can I write a quickening story set in my workplace, for my colleague R? Well, I'm not sure, but I'll give it a go, and I'd like to write Connor.)

And various other things I want to finish/start/think about. So, ridiculously, bearing in mind this has been the Week of Doom workwise and I'm just about to crawl into bed with a hot water bottle (snow today!) blackcurrent tea and Carnivale (although this may change: I also have an exceedingly lurid biography of Paula Yates to hand) there is no excuse to be doing this meme.

But anyway, juleskicks has a meme whereby you can suggest what I should be writing, here. Or could be writing. Or, you know, something you'd like to see. Whatever!

You know ... sometimes, someone does something for you. It's unexpected and unasked-for and magical, and all you can do is say thank you. Thank you.

And feel a little wobbly, and more than a little unworthy, and know it's one of those times when all you can do is receive gracefully.

Two people have done this to me recently. The first is easy to say. ishafel has just posted a new story. It's called The Wolf Queen, and she wrote it for one of my yuletide requests. It's set after Guy Gavriel Kay's Lions of Al-Rassan finishes, after the poetry is done. But there is still poetry here, in this story, although - This is no place for lions. It is haunting, and beautiful, and reminds me of how much I admire the themes and ideas ishafel writes. It's a short story, but there's a lot to it.

Thank you.

The second is less easy, because (as you, dear f-list, will probably know by know) rather typically it involves an unsent e-mail. Rather a long time ago - before Christmas, in fact - ac1d6urn sent, completely out of the blue, a translated transcript of comments on Black Story. Under no circumstances would I ever have seen these otherwise and - I was extraordinarily touched. It would have taken, ack, hours to do.

Readers, I read these comments. Again. And again. And three days later, I was still wincing from trying to explain how much it meant to me and how grateful I was. A week went by. And by now I was wincing again from how I could explain ... how late I was replying.

It will not surprise you to learn that I have still not replied.  And then. Just after New Year, a parcel was delivered. It was again from ac1d6urn, and it contained an absolutely lovely sketch, which she had sent from America - just like that. I've taken a picture. It's here.

And I have still not e-mailed and thanked her for it. Nor have I posted pictures of the beautiful, framed commission ac1d6urn painted for me - it's here, Snape and Harry with books and fire, if you want another look. (Although that has more to do with asking one's exes to frame things for one, for although I was promised before Christmas, no, it still hasn't been done.)

And all I can say is, sorry.

And thank you. Thank you.

rerunawards
For the very best recent fiction and artwork in Buffy, Highlander, Due South ... um, MASH, Sentinel ... voting now! (Perhaps I should re-phrase that. Yes, voting now, but lots of lovely reading there.)

riddle_gifts
Which is I think the first Voldemort fiction fest. it has prompts and a fiction exchange, and I am *so* ignoring the prompts. Really. I even turned down ...

snarry_games.
But I'm pimping it anyway! Posting in April for the wartime v. postwar teams.

Sorry for spam, f-list. Still housekeeping. Oh, I've updated the fiction list at sutcliff_fics too. Whilst I'm pimping small fandoms, can I just mention espresso_addict's earthsea_fic as well? Because this year (ah, resolutions would surface at some point!) is going to be my year of small fandoms and difficult stories. I am hoping for pirates, that Lucy M. Boston story I meant to write last year, and actually finishing the femslash HP. After Other Story and Clothing Porn!

Very quickly, for it is late, and I have just come back from watching Perfume and must to bed-

On Britpicking for snarry_games:

I rather think most people will have their own lovely Britpickers already. There's a few of us around! But if not, feel very free to drop me a note here (I've screened comments) or e-mail. However you would like - if you  want a comment or two, or a quick fact-check, whatever, or a read-through - I'm not bothered. I'll help as much as I can. And if I can't help I'll find a friend who can!

I will apologise now and say, sorry - I'm not on-line every day. Most days, though. And I'll make sure I'm free and available up to the closing date.

... I feel there should be a tag-line. You know, proud to be associated with snarry_games! True. And very best of luck to both teams.

(I did try, once, to write a story set in America. Where I have never been. unovis_lj was incredibly polite - but, um, no. No-one else has ever seen it.)

Ah, cordelia_v.

I would have liked to write you something long and with plot: with eager smutty sex and all sorts of interesting comments, perfectly poised. Not yet. Although all the Snape fiction is for you, in a way.

But I can at least make you laugh. Happy Birthday, most dearly loved fannish friend.

First - it was reddwarfer who wrote In Medias Res for me! I was so chuffed with this story - it was just lovely. And I was so proud when you guys liked it too!

Secondly - I feel awfully godmotherly about regan_v's story Property Rites. Not that I had anything to do with the writing of it - it's just that I've never watched a story being worked on and thought about quite so much before. I knew how hard regan_v worked on it, in the teeth of beta work for half the fest, and it was lovely to see it get the reaction it deserved.

Third - totally pimping unovis_lj's multifandom Suit Porn Challenge . Clothing. Porn. And a fetish I've not encountered before which is ... unusual.

Fourth -

About which at some point when I feel more coherent I will write a whole post.

Fifth. Yup, I did write The Puppet Master for maeglinyedi, which was several different kinds of terrifying all at once.  But she said she liked it! Phew. I owe thanks to regan_v for this one, and to bethia_cathrain as well - most particularly for moral support. Comments, um, now. :)

Well ... I've been reading What Everyone Did in 2006, and about three days ago I thought, that'd be really cool and I must do one too. Then people I haven't seen for ages arrived (I have learned about pizza in Washington, managing Christian Bookshops (!), walking stick evasion techniques and any number of moral quandaries) and I have been Out and Busy and no ...

For the rest of 2006. Or the only other thing that mattered ... unovis_lj mentioned clothing porn, and I thought  of this moment. It's not fannish at all, and really of no interest to anyone except me. But I can't forget.

Did I say R? Oh well. PG-13.  Obviously, more inspiration is required. After the 28th, when Sandman return to the Barony. :)

This is the bit unovis_lj hasn't seen, so there are even more mistakes due solely to my own efforts. It's for darthhellokitty, of course. Part 1 can be found here.

I'd say something about yuletide fics and flist, but we'd be here until tomorrow if I did, so comments to follow.

raindroproses wrote A World Engendered for me, thank you! (I keep re-reading this. I must drop her another note - it unfolds like damask patterned wallpaper, this story, and I like it more the more I read.)

So, I wrote ... Blue Moon Rising for sanj, Guy Gavriel Kay's Tigana, Alessan/Baerd. This was beta'd by bethia_cathrain (who wrote herself The Prunesquallor's New Aide, Gormenghast). Apart from being nervous (GGK!) I really enjoyed this one, research and everything. And sanj liked it, which I was a bit nervous about also!

Then I picked up the pinch-hit Frontier Games for melannen . (Rosemary Sutcliff, Frontier Wolf, Alexios/Hilarion) I saw it come through on e-mail, read Sutcliff! thought, mine! and replied. But the thing is, I'd replied seconds previously to the prior pinch-hit, 63. So I really messed elynross around, which was an awful thing to do. Then I discovered ... it's one of the few RS books I don't have. Neverthless, it got written in a breathless 24 hours, phew, and melannen liked it, phew! (Raises eyebrow and grins at lebannen, who was of course right about the author.)

Then came pinch-hit 63. That's the one I asked for and immediately dropped for Frontier Wolf, but I had nightmares about getting the thing back.
I did.
So in three hours on Christmas Day I also wrote Domination for esteliel (Carol Berg, Transformation trilogy, Sayonne/Aleksander mild dom). Spot the typos! I think this was possibly the last story uploaded - it certainly went in after the archive went live - and I think a little of the pressure of four days with AP's showed. Unbelievably (bless her) esteliel liked it.

Hm. Very close to canon, this lot, far closer than in  previous years. However, in the grey aftermath of Hogmanay - free alcohol from someone anonymous! Guinness (dark liquid) is just the thing for this overcast weather - I am just about to light the fire, open friends presents from Christmas I did not dare touch in front of the APs, and make chocolate sponge pudding - so thank you!